The one thing that is absolute in child loss is how much special times of the year suck.
Besides birthdays, father’s Day/ mother’s Day , Christmas is the one huge one that we all feel the same about , more so if you haven’t had the opportunity to have more children following a loss .
For me as an angel dad to 1 , Dad to a beautiful rainbow and step dad to a wonderful little boy, you would think I enjoyed Christmas , Sadly I don’t , I hate It with a passion, And if I could get away without celebrating it I would .
You see having 2 living children doesn’t change my mind on Christmas, because there’s one important person missing and that’s Oliver & that won’t ever change .
I really wish I could enjoy Christmas , but I just can’t . Of course come Christmas day I’ll be all smiles for the family but , deep down it will break me just as much as every other year since Oliver died .
So this Christmas do what you want to do , grieve how you want to grieve and only do something you are comfy with .
My one bit of advice as I finish this blog is to make sure you talk to someone when your feeling at your lowest, don’t ignore it find someone to talk to and don’t do it alone.